As I sit here listening to P and B discuss football plays and tackles while playing PS2 I sigh a bit and smile.....the sounds of their voices, the dogs lying around, the cats beating each other up, I cannot help but realize how lucky I am and how good of a life we have.
I read a story today about Japan and it literally made me cry. I don't often do that to a friggen' news story but this one in particular just struck a nerve in me. Perhaps it's because I've been studying tsunamis, earthquakes, and volcanoes in my Geology class the last few weeks so I'm paying more attention, perhaps it's because this is such a small island that is packed tightly together with people who are so very proud and strong, or just maybe it's because I'm human. No matter really....
Why did I cry? Because their lives are turned upside down while I sit in the comfort of my home, my family safe, with food in the fridge and clean air to breathe with no threat. Because all around it seems that people wallow in their own little pity parties, seeking sympathy, seeking to hurt others, seeking to bring others down, or seeking to do whatever the hell it is while there is real drama going on in this effed up world.
Life does suck sometimes....I've had my share of shitty moments but each time I pick myself back up and move on....There are people out there who really need some help and support, a roof over their heads...what right do I have to complain because I have homework? What right do I have to whine about anything really? Petty, petty, petty! All of it. It's all dust in the wind....each day I wake to the same homework and the same life...God thank you for that and each breath I breathe!
My tears have turned into anger with the selfishness that we all seem immune to. I'm no better than the next guy and take things for granted quite often. Outside of that 'self-pity bubble' there lies bigger problems, more serious drama as we all sit and ponder what horrible thing sucks in our life today. Bullshit.
People choose their feelings, people choose their state of mind, people choose to blame others or to make others responsible for emotions. What about the raw emotions of those in the midst of this tragic event....most of us, if given a choice, would choose to have the life we have as opposed to be in the middle of hell in Japan right? But is our life really so damn terrible that we have to gripe about it or wallow in our own tears of self pity?
The thing I'm trying to say here is that life sucks...I get that as most others probably do. But kick the damn pebble out of your way and move on and look around at just how much worse it could be. If you have a home you are fortunate, if you have a car you are fortunate, if you have a crappy job, you are fortunate, if you have a husband or wife your lucky to be and to have love, if you have children, you are lucky to experience some really great moments, if you have a single friend cherish them....Most of us are pretty damn lucky I think....lucky to just be.
One saying I have always liked is: "The clock is running. Make the most of today. Time waits for no man. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why it is called the present." I don't know who said this but damn...it's the truth!
Sometimes the past is painful...I have one of those that haunts me every so often but I can choose to turn off the switch and enjoy what is right here in front of me....love that is so great that sometimes I cannot even breathe, kids that are so wonderful most days that I could just burst with pride, a roof that isn't exactly wonderful but it's home all the same, a truck with bald tires but it gets me where I need to go...and most importantly a life that I chose--the key word there being 'chose'.
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