Monday, July 12, 2010

Some eerily gentle relief and normalcy!

It's a new week and things are beginning to feel a bit more normal. P's mom is home now and seems to be doing really well. Her excitement and relief when I spoke with her on the phone the day she was leaving the transitional facility was so refreshing! All I can say is while in the midst of something like that life seems to be so dark and morbid! Thank you to everyone who called and emailed their support--it meant the world to us.

Now, after what was an amazing weekend with my husband and our kids, it's time to start the week and look forward to the last two weeks of these classes that have been stressing me out beyond belief! They're going to be two hellish weeks but the last two all the same. Philosophy and Algorithms....what a combination and a mind change I've been required to have. After next week I am cutting back to one class per block for a couple months just to catch my breath and get a perspective on life again. School has definitely been consuming but also a reprieve in some respects.

We have our annual vacation coming up in a few weeks! Cannot wait for that...we're heading back to the same place we've gone for the last two years. I think we've found a 'home'. LOL Before that happens though we're preparing for what we hope to be a good week of soccer for the boys. Districts is on Thursday and if they win, they get to go to State. I so hope they pull it together and win like they've been doing all season. I would love to see our boy make it to State!

Our youngest daughter will be turning 15 next Monday...god, how time flies. I still look at her and see a 10-year old little girl. She's growing up too fast and seems to think that she's 18. Ahhh, life with teenage girls. I have to say I'm looking very forward to the end of that. It's been a tough road with three girls. Girls are much easier when they are in their 'princess' years and sweet...once they hit the golden age of 13 a parent wonders what happened to their sweet little girl who was all about being just like mommy and being daddy's little girl! Make-up, drama, boyfriends, attitude..oh my! But, on the other side of that blossoms this beautiful woman who adores her parents, loves her daddy beyond belief and takes no grief from anyone.

The years of butting heads with us as their parents are certainly trying but the end result is so worth it all. Right now, with our youngest girl, I stress, worry, get angry and frustrated but keep telling myself that once she's over that mountain she is going to be one hell of a tough girl....she is definitely our most trying daughter with a mix of the older two....amazing how we were prepared for this one.

Our boy is just now starting to hit those defiant days...I often ask myself if I have the strength and energy to withstand yet another teenager; but somewhere, somehow that strength and energy magically step up to the plate just when I need them the most.

So for today, life is great again, P and I had a really nice weekend but like usual it was too short. We spent 10 hours in the boat on Saturday and barely caught anything but wind burns and exhaustion from way too much sun. We were fortunate enough to have an early morning mini thunderstorm that amounted to maybe two cracks of thunder, a couple streaks of lightening and this extremely dark, rolling, long, ominous cloud that reminded us both of the Stephen King short story 'The Mist". As both of us looked up at this cloud rolling similar to how a rolling pin would roll, we both expressed how creepy that thing was. What made it even more so was before the cloud got over our head the water was like glass-the second it was roiling straight above us this wicked, cold wind started whipping across the lake.

After it passed, I settled down since I am not a big fan of weather and lakes. The chills stopped emanating up and down my spine..not from cold but from the creep out factor, we moved across the lake to calmer water and looked behind us. The big eerie cloud was dissipating and roiling back up into the sky. The eeriest part of this whole experience was how low this cloud was to the tree tops. P said it looked to be only about 300-ft above our heads. Needless to say, I've only read fictional stories about this sort of thing but never have I been witness to it. It was cool yet freaky and not something I would care to experience...well, maybe I would because it was much more than what I've explained.

The best part of all of this is there wasn't some impending sense of worry or doom in the backs of our minds this weekend. The ability to feel something other than that dreaded fear P and I have been feeling the last couple weeks was a welcome relief...even though I just found some other avenue to steer my worries and was much different than all that other crap!


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