Who I am in a nutshell: "To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to leave the world a little better; whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is the meaning of success." **Ralph Waldo Emerson**
Thursday, June 14, 2007
An early tribute to Dads
With Father's Day just around the corner isn't it so appropriate to find this article?
The Psychology of Fatherhood
This statement in particular: "What's less clear is whether dads--at least as a group--have done a good enough job to deserve the honor."
So tell me, is there EVER an article about moms that is this insulting or harsh? Why is it that father's are always the bad guys? Oh, that's because they're guys..duh!
I know MANY great fathers who work their butts off to support their families, their kids, and some who even work double time so that mom can stay home with their kids. My dad was one of them and my mom pulled the weight on the other end. In other words, they worked as a team. And regardless of the fact that my father was rarely home, it was the quality of that time I did have with him that paid off, not the quantity.
I know plenty of fathers who go that extra mile to see their kids events, to teach their kids, who take time to go fishing or hunting with their kids, who take them to sporting events or sit through that endless dance recital and smile. But because dads aren't there to spend every waking moment with their kids they are chastised and raked through the mud. Because these dads are out there working to make ends meet, they aren't really being dads at all. They're just out there working their lives away because they do so enjoy the challenge and spending their days at work. Gee, who wouldn't love to just live to work all the time!!!!
On the other hand, I know a HANDFUL of dead beat dads who want nothing to do with their kids. Dads who have tried desparately to hang on to a relationship with their kids despite the relationship with their significant other only to be dragged through the court system, charged massive amounts in child support, and badgered so much by the mother of these children that it's just easier for them to walk away and hope that one day when their kids are adults that those kids will grow up to understand how very difficult it was for the father to be around them due to unsettling circumstances.
Do I agree that fathers should just walk away from their kids? No but man or woman, the human spirit can only take so much abuse before their mojo is shattered! Before they are emotionally, physically and financially drained to the point of seeking refuge in a new life. And I might add that the children are at least left in the hands of the mom's more times then not. If the mom's would appreciate more what dad's have to offer perhaps they wouldn't be left to raise those children on their own. It takes two.
I am so tired of dad's taking a beating in the media. Women, MOM'S to be exact, are no damn angels either. They work, they spend only a couple hours a day with their kids, they go out and are guilty of many of the same things that fathers are with the whole women's rights movement yet they are deemed as hard working loving moms who sacrifice so much. Give me a break.
It would be nice if the negativity surrounding fathers would disappear, if women could take a stand and recognize that they are no more hard working and loving parents then the men who help to pay the bills or mow the lawn or clean that kitchen or coach their children's sports.
After all, wasn't the whole women's liberation thing about equality and being able to do the things that men do? Stop tipping the scale and recognize the good that all do and be grateful to those men out there who are good, honest, loving, hard working fathers.
In my humble opinion, dad's deserve this honor as much as the woman next door! It's just too damn bad that people like these writers of this article can't get past their own bitterness towards men.
To all you dad's out there? Here's wishing you an early "Happy Dad's Day"! Kudos to those of you who sacrifice for the sake of your families.
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