Thursday, June 2, 2005
Marriage is such a bond to treasure. I recently did a post on husbands and what a pain in the derierre they can be. No really, they are wonderful.
I found an article today of a couple that has been married for 80 years! 80 years!!! The longest in history, and the longest in the Guiness Book as well. The man is 105-years old and the woman is 100. Not only are they the record holder for the longest marriage but "also for the oldest married couple's aggregate age".
Their secret? "their success was down to a glass of whisky, a glass of sherry and the word "sorry". I can definately relate to that. Although my secret would be more of, a diet mountain dew, a cigarette and the word 'sorry' in the case of our marriage.
My parents celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary 3 years ago. With 8 kids in my family, it was quite a nightmare to plan for their party. We decided to cater it ourselves and go the cheaper route since they wanted nothing fancy.
In all of the fighting that went on between the siblings, it seemed to me along the way that what was most important was being forgotten. The 50 golden years that my parents struggled through.The 50 years that they fought to hold together.
Aside from all of the nightmares though, we celebrated what turned out to be a wonderful day of memories, family, friends, and lots of food. I don't remember most of the party and didn't really get to eat because I was running like a chicken with my head cut off. About 250 guests showed up to celebrate this glorious day.
I personally was in awe through most of the planning. I can only dream of 50 years of marriage. A successful marriage has always been a priority of mine.
I relived a lot of good memories as well as bad memories from my childhood years. But the example that was presented through all of it was one of strength and devotion through the good and the horrible and there was much horror.
Being married for 17 years has been a road paved with numerous hurdles, heartaches, laughs, tears, yelling, kids, stress but most of all love.
Maybe we just don't know of enough happily married couples but it seems the ones we do run across, there are so many complaints and gripes. There is so much blame and fault towards one another.
Patrick and I don't complain about each other. At least I don't complain about him. We have always tried to have respect for one and other and to understand that there are differences and quirks that we accept. We both take the Sacrament of Marriage very seriously.
Sure, we get mad at eachother and have our arguements but I don't immediately pick up a phone and call whoever I can and say horrible things about him. People disagree, people don't always like what another says or a tone in which it is said. No big deal to me, we move ahead and mend that hurdle.
Marriage is about more than the word 'sorry' or 'yes dear' or that cigarette or mountain dew that we are so addicted to.
This couple, Percy and Florence Arrowsmith from Britain, have spent 80 years ironing wrinkles in their union. Wrinkles that reappear time after time until perfection is achieved. But is that perfection ever achieved?
Marriage is very hard work. Something that often times gets left in the dust when a new baby arrives or some stress creeps up on you. It needs re-tuning on a daily basis and at times on an hourly basis. It isn't something that one can flipantly push aside because they are too tired to deal with the pain of working it out. It requires a strength that comes from within and a love that conquers all that is bad.
I say this only from my own experience simply because the fight to remain married is so much stronger than the defeat of simply letting go of the man that I love. It would be so easy to take the keys to my vehicle and drive off never to be heard from. That thought has briefly crossed my mind only to be overrun with the thought of losing my best friend. My one true confidant. The one who knows every little thing about me, my deep dark secrets, all my quirks, every look that I have on my face.
There are a lot of memories to be had with a marriage. Sometimes people get into situations that aren't what they appeared to be in the beginning and end up recovering from horrible things.
But I believe that marriage is underrated, and in many cases taken for granted. That many people assume that it will be as easy as pie once the paper is signed and the ring is on that finger.
For my hubby and me, marriage is wonderful bliss. We are determined to hit that 50 year mark, maybe even 60 or 70 depending on how long we can live. But with our diets and our habits.....
It is a serious thing to commit to one person for the rest of ones' life. To create a life around that one person.
Compromise, trust, love, honesty, support, laughter, tears, communication, hugs, comfort. These are just a few of the things that build my marriage and at times they falter and all engines fail so to speak. But to find the road again, all of these things must be re-discovered again only to fail eventually.
To some, this sort of life may sound boring, routine, and simply annoying but to myself I love the adventures that marriage has to give me. I love having the love of my life next to me everyday. (although he should smile more)
I guess that I was meant to be the marrying type. Who knows but Kudos to this couple in Britain.
A toast to them for enduring soooo many roller coasters.
Written by louie0768 .
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